[userspace-rcu] make the userspace-rcu dependecy optional

Disable the userpace-rcu support by default.
Our used userspace-rcu flavor memb is rather new and not available in
liburcu version 0.10 available in debian buster.
This change switches from using DCE and "if constexpr" to the C
preprocessor so the library is only needed when the userspace-rcu support
is actually enabled.